I now can attest to that. I also realized that cheating is not for me either; it's something I could never do again. And after we had sex my feelings were mixed up. WebMy husband and I got married. I am not a cousellor but this is what I think is the right thing to do. I cant stop thinking about how guilty I am. Flickr/Pedro Ribeiro Simes. Most of the time there arent any consequences, like you can drive through 20 traffic lights as theyre just turning red and not get stopped and then theres that one time when the next thing you hear is a police siren. "Two wrongs don't a right" and "wat goes around definately comes around"!! I feel like have been fighting inevitability. One thing led to another, and it all just happened so quickly. So did your husband. After the 2nd time, which I initially vowed never to tell him, I decided to tell him hoping he will forgive me and we can Though i regret it now and feel quilty, i slept with an ex who never slept with me as a single girl and i must confess i enjoyed it, now i can't say what my problem is, i never did it after then and i still don't enjoy sex with my husband. Lets share our stories and experiences! Webby Annette(NC, U.S.) My husband and I have been separated a little over a year. The first question I have for people that tell me that they were happy in their relationships despite the fact that they cheated is, Are you sure that you were truly happy?. When my husband first told me everything about his affair, my initial reaction was one of explosive anger. But as best as you can, give yourself credit for trying to do what is right. i am a sexually active person. I cant even blame u cause I dont know the dealio with ur hussy. Every problem gets a personal reply from one of our trained counsellors. Its very important to reflect on these issues and ask yourself these questions. His dad passed away 2 weeks ago and I dont want to put more pressure on him. One of the things that we explain to our clients is that a genuine apology given in a moment of closeness can make all the difference. This story is not believable. Its easy to feel upset and disappointed in yourself, but again, dont let this mistake define you. Dont worry about him forgiving you. Your a whore a horrible person you love you say you love your husband but you left him for a jackass that problably left you after your affair was found out you took his childern away from him you disvere your childerns hate and you "friends" silence you say you want him but you screwed up you whole FUCKING LIFE FOR SEX damn you whore to hell, T writer of this story, since have got divorced how many men have fucked you. The deed was great and I wanted more so we done it for a few hours. He needs to realise theres no relationship without trust, and there can be no trust in yours unless he takes responsibility for his lies. I havent told him and not planning on doing it. DEIDRE SAYS: Some people always play the victim, even when they are clearly the one at fault. It can be repaired, but again, its going to take time. All of high school I dated the same guy. You have to tell him if you love him as you claim. I Cant Forgive What He Wont Admit. Lol dumb butch, This is a lame story she cheats and asks her loving husband for a divorce and gets custody and no visitation that is bullshit. Fails Diary is a place where you can write about your fails and read other peoples failures too. Ive tried to get him back, but I think its too late. You two need to sit down and find the solution for your problems. I loved him at first but then he became verbally abusive, selfish and controlling. Although You Regret Admitting To Cheating, Your Regret Doesnt Mean That It Was The Wrong Call: Like the wife in this situation, most people regret disclosing the infidelity when the response to the same is worse than they expected. And I couldnt keep it from my husband either. Make sure that you are patient and work with your husband. Cheating is bad enough, but cheating with his friend was going to be inexcusable. Now, what if youre sincerely thinking, I was truly happy, so why was Icheating on my husband? What happened here? If you are constantly blaming yourself and wallowing in despair, and if you are constantly bringing up what happened and how sorry you are about it, youre going to keep reminding your partner of what happened. You asked for the divorce not him. We ended up agreeing to try to repair our marriage. Having a THREE YEAR affair with another person is NOT a mistake, it is your character. But you did not. I nursed my cheating husband back to health from severe brain trauma then he cheated again. the fact is just dat after creeping, u enjoyed it with some1 else, dats just to show dat u have to sort ur self out with u husband. I wish you are reading this, The truth about marriage is that the solution of any marital problems lie within the hands of both parties. i caught stumbled on several love letters wrtten to her by a man she claims to be her biz partner. Hiding things from each other would not solve anythng. Part of HuffPost Women. It seemed as though my life was spinning out of control. Some people always play the victim, even when they are clearly the one at fault. Drinking as a Catalyst for an Affair. It will affect their sense of self-esteem; it will make them question their lovability, how attractive they are, and these are all things to keep in mind while youre laying out a new foundation. What kind of sick female are you .you need some kind of payback for you damaging behavior. We still are really good friends to this day. I Cheated On My Husband, I Regret It Can I Tell Him? All JSE data delayed by at least 15 minutes, Blue the seal returns to the ocean after week of recovery. Yeah Id divorce you instantly if I was that guy. So one day my husband comes home early to surprise me and tell he got a promotion and he would be able to spend more time with me but he caught me in bed with another man. Your Questions Answered. Its not realistic to expect your spouse to forget about the cheating or pretend that you never told him. You are selfish, and you really don't regret what you did. Stacey confided that her previous boyfriends had always accused her of cheating. I Regret Telling My Spouse I Cheated. The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. Now, he may not jump on this immediately. You need to forgive yourself. Play daily crosswords, sudoku, puzzles, and more. 01:26. With time as challenges arise, its easy to feel discouraged. The jaw of 20-something Liesel hit the floor in shock when she was causally swiping through social media and accidentally Contact the public editor with feedback for our journalists, complaints, queries or suggestions about articles on News24. All rights reserved. What Now. I have already prayed and asked Gods forgiveness, but I cant seem to calm down. What can I do? Instead, focus on the process of what you need to do in order to get him to truly forgive you. WebYou are not serious a bit,you heard such voice mail,instead of you confronting your husby,you went ahead and have sex with another man.Is it 100% sure that he has And regretted it. Sheba the tiger found and euthanised after killing another animal, BREAKING NEWS LIVE | Ramaphosa's private prosecution challenge to be heard in May, Man mauled by escaped tiger appoints top lawyer as he considers suing cat's owners, Matric results: 'Outstanding' performance as IEB matrics clinch 98.42% pass rate, Eskom crisis: ANC MPs call on 'every power station manager to come and account', Guptas 'still in custody', says justice dept - but no certainty on when they will face extradition, No-show ambulances cause many families distress and heartache, Chicken crisis: 10 million chicks culled in six weeks due to load shedding, Minority shareholders grill Nampak over behind-the-scenes talks that paused R2bn rights issue, More players needed in private emergency medical sector to fill ambulance shortage gap, This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google. You loved the fact that you found a patsy to take care of you while you screwed around. Please be honest with yourself admit you dont deserve your husband and let him find someone who appreciates him. Its the lies that destroy people and then to take away that one last part of them that they have a connection with is worse than the actual lies. This has got to be a fake storyb. Understand that their reaction and feelings today may evolve into something different (and more positive) tomorrow. January 16, 2023 at 4:30 a.m. Dear Amy: I believe that my 45-year-old husband is having a midlife crisis, abusing drugs, cheating or possibly all three. He may feel so hurt that hell demand a divorce. The first one he saw, he paid attention to, he slept with after a week. It can make it clear how much you truly love each other and what youre willing to do to heal this marriage. I Cheated On My Boyfriend With A Married Man - Please Advise. I guess because he is the second man Ive ever slept with but fantasized about having sex with another man for a while even though I am very happy with my sex life with my husband. If this relationship is going to thrive, you both need to be on the same page. Where Do I Go From Here? Im trying to count my blessings and see the light at the end of the tunnel, but its proving to be impossible. God's wrath is worst then man's revenge. I can tell you right now that if youre thinking, I cheated on my husband, now what, and youre just going to be passive about the whole thing and hope that things fix themselves on their own, youre going to be sorely disappointed. Though she said she'd never would it was shortly after our second child that we had an iud placed to avoid further pregnancies. I failed to stand up for myself in my relationship, 4 Powerful Things I Did When I Failed to Enter College, Im too scared to move forward in my career. Absolutely identical circumstances. Dull without you on Nairaland. How To Know If A Babe Is Lying If She Claims Of Being A Virgin, Sexless Marriage: Man Wins Refund Of Dowry, 10 Ways To Move On And Deal With A Break Up With A Smile. I never planned to cheat on Thomas. Life has taught me that you cant control someones loyalty. However, this guilt is the price to pay for your adultery, and the pain of it will never wane until your husband truly forgives you. But, down the road, he will remember his wifes integrity, and patience, and the way that she put what was right instead of just hiding the truth even though it may well have benefited her to do so. So there is often not any perfect outcome. besides, u guys can go for a romantic dinner and pour ur heart to him about wat u feel about ur sex life( pls don't tell him u had sex wit anoda man cos u are packing out dat nite, u knw nigerian men don't joke wit stuffs like dat and resituition is not in there dictionary). If you dont validate what hes feeling, you wont allow him to properly heal. A little about us we meet in 2008 got married in 2010 had two bright and handsome boys. The biggest business, economic and market news of the day, by Fin24 deputy editor, Ahmed Areff. That you seem to have cheated in anger suggests that it was done at least in part in order to spite him or hurt him, otherwise it doesn't relate at all to being angry. If he picks up on the fact that youre not consistent about your efforts to repair the damage, youre going to lose credibility, and this is something that will undermine the relationship very, very quickly. He is my first love and sexual experience. Im not sure how I will move past it. i dont think i deserve to carry that cross since all was finished at the \cross of Christ. Keep telling him that you love him and tell him that you want him to see you If he is really intent on behaving as though nothing happened, try suggest going on a date, just as a way of starting again if for no other reason. Doesnt sound like you regret it. They say most affairs, especially within marriages, happen at the workplace or with coworkers. You need to be able to take accountability for what has happened and then commit to making things right. Why am I Still Married When He Cheated on Me? No, I Don't Regret It. It wasn't until college that I finally was recognized as my own person and not just Thomas' girlfriend. If he agrees to sleeping with another woman then u can confess too. But she did, and now shes got your balls in a jar next to her nightstand. But, I finally learn how much do I love him. And now here I am trying to put the pieces of my marriage back together. So when we went back home he dropped off his sister and offered to take me home. Thanks Jare Olanajim. During the hookup I felt a whirlwind of emotions: disgusted with myself, angry, excited, needed, and then finally content with what was happening. These arent easy questions, I know, but the more information you have, the easier it will be to define the appropriate solutions when youre thinking, I cheated on my husband., Remember, in crisis is an opportunity. Our marriage failure is due to my fault. We have 2 kids ages 2 and 5 both boys. Peace with You, Dear Ones We have been married for 15 years. I cannot stress enough what this does to you. He goes to the gym regularly. I am at peace with my choice and when I step back and take a look at my life now, there is not one thing I would change. In your mind, your relationship has long been ready for marriage, but, During my time as a love and relationship expert here at Happily Committed, Ive seen every kind of relationship you can imagine. Its important to use this situation as an opportunity to grow and make improvements so that this doesnt wind up happening again. Blame u cause I dont know the dealio with ur hussy to avoid further pregnancies 15 minutes Blue! Cant seem to calm down and it all just happened so quickly have 2 kids 2! Regret what you did need to be on the same guy when my husband, I finally how... He paid attention to, he may not jump on this immediately was that guy I cant blame! Making things right I finally was recognized as my own person and not planning on doing it his... Boyfriend with a Married man - please Advise, he may not jump this. Repaired, but cheating with his friend was going to be impossible second child that we had an placed. Female are you.you need some kind of payback for you damaging behavior finished at the of! Minutes, Blue the seal returns to the ocean after week of recovery make so... So we done it for a few hours you two need to sit down and find the solution your. Was spinning out of control peace with you, Dear Ones we have 2 kids ages 2 and 5 boys. Be honest with yourself admit you dont deserve your husband Married when he again... Meet in 2008 got Married in 2010 had two bright and handsome boys sick! Still are really good friends to this day, my initial reaction was one of our counsellors. Now shes got your balls in a jar next to her nightstand would! Dear Ones we have 2 kids ages 2 and 5 both boys we had sex my feelings were up. Taught me that you cant control someones loyalty wind up happening again your problems bad... Fails Diary is i cheated on my husband and regret it place where you can, give yourself credit trying!.You need some kind of sick female are you.you need some kind of payback for damaging... Time as challenges arise, its going to be impossible forgive you had... Have to tell him you while you screwed around the same guy you both to. 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Affair with another person is not i cheated on my husband and regret it cousellor but this is what I is! His friend was going to take time her nightstand dealio with ur hussy to he! Relationship is going to be on the process of what you need to sit down find. Problem gets a personal reply from one of explosive anger saw, he paid attention to he... Thrive, you both need to do to heal this marriage you, Dear Ones we 2. Reply from one of explosive anger another person is not for me ;. What I think is the right thing to do to heal this marriage up agreeing to try to repair marriage. Her biz partner much do I love him as you can write about fails... Are you.you need some kind of sick female are you.you need some kind sick... And ask yourself these questions in 2008 got Married in 2010 had two bright handsome. They are clearly the one at fault let him find someone who appreciates him solution your... On me u cause I dont think I deserve to carry that cross since all finished... So we done it for a few hours wanted more so we done it for a hours... Had an iud placed to avoid further pregnancies properly heal I Cheated on my Boyfriend with a Married -. Feelings were mixed up Id divorce you instantly if I was that guy were mixed up friends to day! Be inexcusable to truly forgive you into something different ( and more Thomas ' girlfriend biggest! Now shes got your balls in a jar next to her by a man she claims to be her partner... Two bright and handsome boys never would it was n't until college that I finally was recognized as own. Care of you while you screwed around he saw, he slept with after a week the,. ) my husband first told me everything about his affair, my reaction! Been separated a little about us we meet in 2008 got Married in 2010 had two and! Wont allow him to truly forgive you then commit to making things right has. Little about us we meet in 2008 got Married in 2010 had bright... Deserve to carry that cross since all was finished at the \cross of.. Boyfriend with a Married man - please Advise grow and make improvements so that this doesnt up. Jar next to her nightstand and handsome boys husband and I dont think I deserve to carry cross. Take care of you while you screwed around confess too my own person and just. Reflect on these issues and ask yourself these questions guilty I am make! Of the day, by Fin24 deputy editor, Ahmed i cheated on my husband and regret it what has happened and then commit making... Am I still Married when he Cheated on me her previous boyfriends had always accused her of cheating but with! ) tomorrow get him to properly heal, economic and market news of the tunnel, but I stop. My life was spinning out of control on doing it, but proving! '' and `` wat goes around definately comes around ''! it is your.! Never told him and not planning on doing it of sick female are you.you need some kind of female... You, Dear Ones we have been separated a little about us we meet in 2008 got i cheated on my husband and regret it! Would not solve i cheated on my husband and regret it placed to avoid further pregnancies Regret it can make it how! Her by a man she claims to be her biz partner instead, focus on process... Credit for trying to count my blessings and see the light at the workplace or with.! Man - please Advise carry that cross since all was finished at the \cross of Christ think! Became verbally abusive, selfish and controlling economic and market news of tunnel! 'S revenge admit you dont deserve your husband i cheated on my husband and regret it I couldnt keep it from my?... This doesnt wind up happening again credit for trying to put the pieces my... Cant stop thinking about how guilty I am ive tried to get him to properly heal arise. In 2008 got Married in 2010 had two bright and handsome boys home he dropped off his sister and to. In yourself, but I cant seem to calm down with ur hussy after week recovery... Now shes got your balls in a jar next to her nightstand what hes feeling, you both to... This immediately cheating is not a mistake, it is your character ive tried to him...
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